From the world of weird ass things comes this:
If you guessed that was a pretend vampire mouth that a man could put a penis in, then you are the winner kid. While manually stimulating yourself with a disembodied vampire mouth is pretty sad, the real crime here is that the laws of physics are completely broken. Seriously, there’s no way that a pair of canines that large would not drag across the male member. Out of any monster to get a BJ from, I’d put vampire real low on the list. Mummy would probably be number one, considering he’s probably going to be gumming you, though the Blob wouldn’t be too bad if it didn’t dissolve you first.
No thanks to: Geekology