Transformers: Headmasters Episode 29 Recap – “The Master Sword is in Danger”

Chris Piers   May 14, 2013   Comments Off on Transformers: Headmasters Episode 29 Recap – “The Master Sword is in Danger”

I’m not sure what the theme of this week’s episode is but I do know its motif – pointing. The animators went pointing-finger crazy. It’s probably not a great sign when that’s the first thing I notice, but it is what it is. This episode is called “The Master Sword is in Danger” and it kinda, sorta is! The episode begins with the Autobots wondering if Scorponok has left planet Master, where they remain after defeating them last week. Highbrow points out his logic of why Scorponok hasn’t left Master.

Count the number of times someone points this episode.

Count the number of times someone points this episode.

His logic is that since Scorponok was built on Master, he can only get fuel for it on Master. This is a strange bit of logic since every Transformer was built SOMEWHERE but they all seem to able to suck down energy from anywhere. Read on to see where this goes.

Pointblank gives Highbrow a massive backhanded compliment, essentially letting everyone know he agrees with Highbrow. He says that Highbrow is smart but has zero fighting ability. Thanks, asshole.

I have a POINT to make.

I have a POINT to make.

The Decepticons are in the caves on planet Master and plan to harvest G-Metal to build a more powerful shield for Scorponok. Why they didn’t bother doing this when they originally built Scorponok is a mystery with no answer.

Sounds cool, bro.

Sounds cool, bro.

The Decepticons throw around statistics about G-Metal that mean nothing to anyone. I don’t know what they’re talking about.

And as soon as we figure out what G is, we'll be impressed.

And as soon as we figure out what G is, we’ll be impressed.

Zarak talks about how they’ll have to distract the Autobots. He calls it a trick which is an awfully innocent way to describe the murder and theft they get up to.

Could someone turn on all the lights?

Could someone turn on all the lights?

On Fortress, Daniel is playing his lame Nintendo Zapper video game and Wheelie is bored by it. The Autobots are bored a lot on this show. The writers might have wanted to see why that is.

Yeah, the Nintendo Zapper IS pretty cool.

Yeah, the Nintendo Zapper IS pretty cool.

Suddenly, Wheelie has an idea. It’s treated like a big deal because it is. Wheelie isn’t smart.

I find that hard to believe.

I find that hard to believe.

Wheelie decides he could be a Headmaster and therefore, way more powerful. He is only thinking of this for the first time months after meeting the Headmasters. I don’t want to say Wheelie is slow but I’ve seen faster turtles. HEY YO! Also? Wheelie points.

Third pointing of the episode and not the last.

Third pointing of the episode and not the last.

Daniel laughs at him. It seemed like an okay idea all things considered, so Daniel is just showing that he’s a terrible friend.

True friendship.

True friendship.

Wheelie points out that no matter what, he’ll always be better than Daniel because at least he’s a Transformer. It sends Daniel into a deep depression, so mission accomplished Wheelie.

You bore me, Wheelie.

You bore me, Wheelie.

The next morning, Daniel is doing his chores, which involve cleaning Fortress. The transformer that’s larger than a city. I don’t even know what would make it dirty enough to need a vaccuum. Are the robots tracking mud around? And why does Fortress even care?

Transforms from vacuum to full vacuum.

Transforms from vacuum to full vacuum.

Wheelie exits Fortress for a jog on planet Master and instantly falls into some sort of quicksand or trap. No Nike Fuel points for you today, Wheelie.

Cartoons made me think quicksand was all over the place.

Cartoons made me think quicksand was all over the place.

Back on the ship, Daniel cares about Wheelie again for some reason and says he can’t find him. Sixshot conveniently calls the Autobots to let them know he’s a hostage.

A crappy one.

A crappy one.

Sixshot threatens to dump Wheelie in acid unless Cerebros hands over the formula for making the Master Sword. The Autobots pretend the phone lost its signal. I wish.

I wanna know what love is!

I wanna know what love is!

Sixshot gives them a three hour window before Wheelie will be killed. That’s a lot of time to make a decision!

Why doesn't the acid eat through Scorponok?

Why doesn’t the acid eat through Scorponok?

Cerebros isn’t quite sure what to do but he DOES love his sword.

Get a hobby.

Get a hobby.

Meanwhile, Skullcruncher taunts Wheelie about how he fell into his trap. It’s important because it’s another example of pointing.

That's ONE successful thing I've done in my life.

That’s ONE successful thing I’ve done in my life.

Pointblank says they can’t hand over such a powerful advantage to the Decepticons. He calls Wheelie a necessary sacrifice of war! The other Autobots aren’t super passionate one way or another.

So let's start with Wheelie!

So let’s start with Wheelie!

While Cerebros sits around not making up his mind, Daniel decides to rescue Wheelie on his own. Instead of letting him die, Chromedome decides to help him secretly.

Swell!

Swell!

However, they bump into Highbrow who doesn’t think it’s a good idea until Chromedome says he will actually try to keep Daniel safe. That changes everything. Highbrow must not have a high opinion of Chromedome.

Daniel, huh? I see.

Daniel, huh? I see.

Highbrow flips a switch that turns Daniel’s toy gun into a real gun and Daniel and Chromedome hop on the Trainbots for a ride. Highbrow lies to say they’re just doing reconnaissance and Cerebros is like, oh ok. Good idea. What a leader.

Uh, who told them to do that?

Uh, who told them to do that?

Pointblank makes an impassioned plea to sacrifice Wheelie and since he’s the only one making an argument, Cerebros finally agrees to go along with it.

Why don't you try being leader, Mr. Smartypants?

Why don’t you try being leader, Mr. Smartypants?

This prompts Highbrow to fess up to his lie. He admits Chromedome and Daniel left to save Wheelie on their own, thus taking the decision out of their leader’s hands. Cerebros might want to lay down some rules.

Seems likely, dumb dumb.

Seems likely, dumb dumb.

Chromedome and Daniel just sort of know where Scorponok is enter Scorponok.  Chromedome POINTS out where Daniel should go, because it is conveniently behind a door only non-Transformers can go through. Why would Scorponok build such a door within himself?

Pointing!

Pointing!

Sixshot wastes some time with Zarak while they decide they should keep themselves on high alert. Good thinking. Now hire someone more competent than your usual idiots for guard duty. May I suggest some dung beetles?

What do YOU think, Sixshot?

What do YOU think, Sixshot?

Chromedome and Daniel easily sneak past the Horrorcons. Chromedome uses telepathy (!) to “know” where Wheelie is.

Oh wait, I can think of why that would never work.

Oh wait, I can think of why that would never work.

Sixshot goes to Fortress and Cerebros stalls for time, saying it takes a long time to WRITE DOWN the secrets of the Master Sword. Robots. They can’t write down info within 3 hours.

And my pen kept running out of ink.

And my pen kept running out of ink.

Eventually, Cerebros walks out with a MASSIVE floppy disk holding the secrets of the Master Sword. This is better than when they read through piles of paper! I love that their idea of futuristic data is just physically larger disks.

This has over 2 MB of data on it!

This has over 2 MB of data on it!

Sixshot questions whether this is a trick and Cerebros tells the least convincing lie ever:

29Headmasters29

Sixshot gets on his comically large cell phone and tells the Decepticons to let Wheelie go free.

Don't call now, I'm over my minutes!

Don’t call now, I’m over my minutes!

Just then, Chromedome and Daniel enter and free Wheelie.

A sad ending.

A sad ending.

The Autobots get the word just in time and decide not to give Sixshot the disk. They ACTUALLY put the info on that disk!

The Autobots should finish him off if they had brains.

The Autobots should finish him off if they had brains.

Zarak decides it’s the perfect time to bust out his new toys and orders the Duocons to go on sale in toy stores everywhere.

Show's almost over, time to introduce new characters!

Show’s almost over, time to introduce new characters!

The Duocons were two small vehicles that could turn into a single robot. Also? The toy didn’t transform. You hooked it together and it would snap upright into the robot form. Interesting gimmick that got old real fast.

Useless apart, semi-useful together!

Useless apart, semi-useful together!

The new toys shout out their names, perfunctorily, and everyone starts fighting.

Mix and match naming.

Mix and match naming.

It turns into the worst football game since that GI Joe episode between GI Joe and Cobra. Everyone wants that disk!

He's at the 30, the 20, he could go all the way!

He’s at the 30, the 20, he could go all the way!

Eventually, Battletrap catches the disk and decides to actually leave the field of battle with it. The Decepticons win!

Touchdown.

Touchdown.

Back in Scorponok, Zarak gets a nice print out of the blueprints for the Master Sword.

Soundblaster, my toner quality is low.

Soundblaster, my toner quality is low.

Pointblank apologizes to Cerebros for losing the battle, but isn’t it really all Wheelie’s fault for going jogging?

Pep talk!

Pep talk!

The episode ends with Wheelie, Chromedome and Daniel being (hilariously?) punished by being ordered to clean Fortress. You know, like they are supposed to every morning as part of their chores? It is now a punishment. Chromeome tries to mop really fast because he’s so angry but his fellow Headmasters praise his work in saving Wheelie’s life. Wheelie POINTS out a spot that Daniel missed.

Work faster, slave.

Work faster, slave.

No one learned anything. The Decepticons have the blueprints to the Autobots’ most powerful weapon. Nothing but fun on this show.