Snack Report: Hostess Mini Cherry Pies


Amazing. Life Affirming. Heavenly. These are words most often used to describe sexual intercourse with me, but they are also words one could use when consuming a Hostess Fruit Pie.

As I’ve mentioned before they are an extreme sometimes food, since they weigh in at 479 calories and I’m on a cutting regime right now. No, I’m not dieting like some sort of delicate flower. I’m cutting! Anyway, Hostess came out with these mini fruit pies to make it easier on people like me who want the joys of a fruit pie, but not all the shame and guilt that comes along with eating one.


These mini fruit pies are 210 calories, which is a lot actually, but also a lot less than 479. Hell, if you do somehow give in and eat two you’re still eating less calories than a normal one.

Right up top we’re hit with pretty much the only negative for the Hostess cherry mini fruit pie, they are only available in multi packs (of six), so the first hurdle one must jump is not to eat more than one at a time. And it’s a rough one.


Let’s follow that up with a big positive: The fruit pies are wrapped in their familar waxy paper packaging that I love and that they’re no longer packaged in. If you haven’t noticed, Hostess fruit pies come in cardboard boxes now. Bleh.

The first thing you have to brace yourself for is how small these are. At 210 calories you’re getting a pretty small pie. I’ve included pictures for reference. I am proud to report by the time I was done I had achieved both orgasm and complete snack satisfaction, so it’s perfectly sized to do the job.


How does it taste? Well, I already covered that in the first paragraph. I had one cherry and it was an exquisite experience. Fans of the crust should note that the crust to filling ratio is much higher on the mini fruit pie than its full sized brethren, so these might appeal to you more if you can’t get enough of that fruit pie crust.


These things are fantastic and I hope they catch on. Ever since the Hostegeddon that resulted in the most disappointing Hostess Cherry Pie experience of my life, I’ve been happy as a pig in slop that they came back and their treats are still available. Innovations like this have made me only happier. Keep it up Hostess. You only have to bring back the chocolate pudding pie and all would be right with the world.

Score: 3 out of 3 Snacky Delights

  • Chris Piers

    Sounds like a messy experience.

  • Shawn

    I think I need to find these.