Snack Report: Hostess Chocolate Donettes

Hostess chocolate donettes

As the world awaits the return of Hostess, I’ve been digging through my Hosteggedon stash eating delicious treats and, more importantly, freeing up freezer space. I meant to post this snack report awhile ago and I wish I did, because looking at the pictures again make me long for the Chocolate Donettes and I don’t have any more!

Before I go on, I must warn you. The method I employed to eat Hostess Chocolate Donettes may gross you out.

In the world of mini donuts, nobody did it better than Hostess, especially in the realm of chocolate. Other brands always felt a bit off due to inferior chocolate. Yeah, Hostess chocolate wasn’t fancy European kind, but it wasn’t waxy or bitter. While Cruch Donettes were an all time favorite, Chocolate were a close second mostly because the manner I ate them was quiet elaborate and I needed more time. Crunch was a more on the go treat.

Hostess chocolate donettes

When I ate a Hostess Chocolate Donette, it was always about dunking in them in milk. And to get the maximum in dunkage, I came up with this method. First you would get a large cup of milk with a large opening (a bowl would also suffice) and one of the donuts.

Hostess chocolate donettes

Next you would bit a small side off one of the donuts. This step is important, because the chocolate shell prevents milk from entering, much like the shields on the Enterprise prevent photon torpedoes from killing everyone.

Hostess chocolate donettes

Take the mini chocolate donut and “dunk it” into the milk. Now air bubbles will stream out of the donut as the milk fills it up with delicious cow love.

Hostess chocolate donettes

Feel free to use a spoon to completely immerse the donut by using a spoon. This way you are assuring yourself of complete milk saturation. Wait for the air bubbles to stop.

Hostess chocolate donettes

Now you can use your spoon to pull the donut out. Just look at that. That’s more beautiful than anything found in nature.

Now here’s the best part. If you’re doing it right, chunks of Chocolate Donettes will end up in the milk. You can even break apart chunks of the donut in the milk for the next part!

Hostess chocolate donettes

Now that your donuts are gone you’ve got delicious Hostess Chocolate Donette sludge! When I created this I didn’t know whether or not this would be the last time I’d enjoy such a disgusting looking taste sensation. So far Hostess has not confirmed whether or not their Donette line will be back. I can only hope that they will return… someday.

Score: 5 out of 5

Also, little chocolate donuts will be forever immortalized in this Saturday Night Live Sketch. Thanks to NBC being complete idiots and not letting Saturday Night Live sketches be available on You Tube for easy reference, I have to link to it.

  • Chris Piers

    Extra fun for those of us who are lactose intolerant!

  • RobotsPJs

    In Wisconsin we throw anyone with the “Milk Disease” in the dungeons.