Best of Toy Bender: Happy Birthday Magic 8 Ball

In the interest of bringing you great new content at Robot’s PJs and me being lazy as hell, here’s an old post I did celebrating the birthday of the Magic Eight Ball a few years back. Enjoy!

magic8ball

Wow, it’s hard to believe that the Magic 8 Ball has been around for 60 years. Who hasn’t trusted the advice of the Magic 8 Ball? I’ve never owned one myself, but the Magic 8 Ball was a trusted advisor when I worked at retail giant Wal-Mart. Whenever I needed some love advice (and I needed it often with the question, “Will I ever get a date?), I’d go right down the aisle where the Magic 8 Ball sat and consulted its wisdom with a few quick shakes. If it didn’t give me the answer I sought, I’d rephrase the question and ask again. If I still didn’t like the answer, at that point I knew it was fate. Some may call it cheating, but I call it fact checking!

Anyway, here are 8 facts that you may not know about the Magic 8 Ball:

1. The Magic 8 Ball has outsold the Magic 13 Ball by about 3000%

2. If you are a man and attempt to drink the fluid inside a Magic 8 Ball, you are daring to go to the place where women cannot go. You may just become the Kwisatz Haderach and make it rain on Dune.

3. If you stacked a million Magic 8 Balls from end to end, you’d be insane.

4. A Magic 8 Ball means something else entirely on the “streets”.

5. President Nixon only decided to resign when he asked a Magic 8 Ball if he should. Its exact answer was, “Signs point to yes, jerk face.”

6. The first prototype Magic 8 Ball was made out of meat and asbestos.

7. Every time a bell rings, a Magic 8 Ball gets its wings.

8. While an Ouija board’s mystic powers come from the terrible brimstone hatred of Satan’s black heart, he has little to do with the Magic 8 Ball.

How do you plan on celebrating this occasion? I plan on grabbing a loved one and rigerously shaking them, while asking them advice in honor of the Magic 8 Ball. It’s really the only appropriate thing to do. Please, shake a love one for the Magic 8 Ball with me! (Please Note: Do not attempt to shake anyone shorter than 3 feet tall. Unless they are a midget.. then shake away!)

  • Behind the 8 Ball

    I love this…If I had a magic 8 ball right now I’d ask it “will I see the check versus debit card post from the past”? I hope it answers “the signs point to yes”…one of my favorites.

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